Be willing to see ourselves clearly takes a lot of courage.

I want to see clearly, at least I think I do but I have come to recognize that looking in a mirror to truly see myself is one of the hardest things I have ever done. You see, I did not always like what I saw so I stopped looking, it was too painful. I didn’t even realize that I had stopped looking and paying attention to myself. I guess it happened so gradually it was imperceptible. I used to think that avoiding looking at myself, participating in life and taking pictures was bringing me peace and protecting me and now I can see that it was keeping me truly living my life. I was living a lie.  Avoiding and hiding from reality did not make anything better for me.  Just because I could not or would not see something did not change my circumstances nor change things.

Eyesight means the world to me.

You see, from the age of about 5 months old my family knew I could not see clearly, it was obvious to everyone as I held every object next to my nose so I could see it. In those days they didn’t fit babies with glasses so I had to wait till age 3 to get glasses so I could see clearly. My mom said I never once pushed away my glasses. I was finally able to see clearly!  How grateful I am that my family noticed and did something to help me be able to see more clearly. This taught me that there are times in your life that you need other people around you that care to help you to know that you are not seeing clearly.  Sometimes we just are not aware, we are unaware of what we are missing.  I now make sure I am open to having loved ones, coaches and an occasional therapist or other professionals to help me to see what I may be missing.

So, what was it I was unwilling to see?

Well, I must be honest, there have been a ton of things over the years.  The main thing I want to focus on today was how obsessed I was with food and eating. Some could say I was compulsive overeater or others a processed food addict and it gradually over the years it became worse as my weight continued to creep up.  It started at 18 when I gained 15 lbs. in the matter of a few weeks after the breakup with my high school boyfriend and weight issues continued for 40 years.  Up and down on a roller coaster ride with my weight  go up  from 15, 20, 30, 45, to 60 lbs.  I like roller coasters, but this ride was not any fun.  But I could not see the cause of my overeating.  I tried numerous diets and many of them would work temporarily but not for long.  I could sometime maintain a normal weight range for about 1 year at most but often I begin gaining whatever weight I had lost within the week of getting to a good range.  I now believe that this is because I was in a Food Fog, unaware of the cause of the problem and trying and failing with wrong solutions.

in 2017 I read a book called, “Bright Line Eating” and begin to SEE that the food issues I had were explainable and that I was not alone in my struggle.  The Food Fog begin to lift.  It all made sense now and I have been on a Sugar and Flour Free path for almost 7 years. It it only the way of living that has been sustainable for me.

I have become passionate about Seeing and especially seeing clearly and  I often ponder if what I am seeing or thinking is true? To check in I now also regularly asked myself “is this true?”   I have learned that often my brain offers me thoughts, or ideas that are not true.  Our brains do this because it is always trying to make meaning and come up with some sort of explanation about things and these ideas and thoughts even when they are not TRUE.  So now I try to question my thoughts.

Did you know?…   We do not need to believe every thought we have.

Our brains think 20,00-60,000 thoughts a day and not all of them are true.  We are not our thoughts and we do not need to believe our thoughts.  I now check in to see if I am seeing clearly. I didn’t realize I had let myself disappear; I had lost sight of myself in so many ways. Maybe it was because it was so hard to see that I just wasn’t good enough in so many ways. From as early as I can remember I always compared myself to others and I just did not think I measured up, I  wasn’t good enough to get a’s and b’s in school, to get picked to be on the team or part of the choir. I came to accept that was just how I was. Be willing to see ourselves clearly takes a lot of courage. We are all different from in other in many ways and constanstly comparing ourselves makes like harder than it needs to be.

I no longer want to hide and avoid the truth. I want you to fully experience all life has to offer the fun and the challenges it makes me feel alive!

The journey to self-awareness is not always easy. For me, it has been a path laden with hurdles and self-doubts to over common. But what I’ve learned is that the first step towards clarity is always the hardest. Once you take that step, the path unfolds in ways you never imagined. The courage and effort is worth it.

The Challenge of Self-Awareness

We often avoid looking at ourselves too closely. It’s like turning on a bright light in a room that’s been dark for too long. The comfort of the darkness is familiar, but it also keeps us from truly seeing. We fear what we might find – flaws, weaknesses, and maybe regrets. But what if, in that light, we also discover our strengths, passions, and untapped potential?

The Journey to Clarity

My journey towards clarity began with a simple yet profound question: “Is this true?” Whenever I found myself doubting my worth or comparing myself to others, I paused and asked this question. Often, I realized my self-criticism wasn’t based on truth but on unfounded fears, internal thoughts and external and societal pressures.

Practical Tips for Seeing Clearly

If you’re struggling to see yourself clearly, start by cultivating a practice of pausing throughout the day. This can be as simple as taking five minutes each day to sit in silence and observe your thoughts without judgment. Journaling is another powerful tool. Write down your thoughts and feelings, and over time, patterns will emerge, revealing deeper insights into your true self. One of my favorite ways of pausing during the day is with a PQ reps, where I spend 10 seconds to 12 minutes paying exquisite detail to my breath or one of my 5 senses.  More coming in a future blog on PQ reps.

The Power of Acceptance

Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means acknowledging where you are right now. When I accepted my imperfections with self-compassion I wasn’t giving up on growth; I was giving myself permission to grow from a place of understanding, not self-critique. Remember, every great journey starts with acceptance of the present.

Seeing ourselves clearly is a continuous journey, not a destination. It’s about peeling back the layers to uncover the truth of who we are and embracing it wholeheartedly. It will allow the fog to lift. It’s about letting go of who we think we should be and accepting who we truly are. We can release things such as old behaviors, thoughts and beliefs that no longer are true or that no longer serve us, if we are willing to keep looking.

As you step forward in your journey of self-discovery, remember that each step, no matter how small, is a leap towards a clearer, more authentic you. I invite you to share your experiences and reflections in the comments below. Let’s support each other in our journeys to clarity and self-acceptance.  I believe that CONNECTION is the KEY to our WEllness.  And if you find you could use more support and connection, check out my private group membership called Release the WEIGHT.  You can find the details here:

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Stay clear, stay true to the TRUE YOU.